Sunday, August 29, 2010

ONE YEAR BANDIVERSARY!!!


Yesterday was the 28th- my very first bandiversary. I had a wonderful post planned but was struck down yesterday morning by a debilitating migraine. After being in bed for more than 26 hours, I am finally sitting down at my computer to write this post.

It's amazing to think that it has already been a year since I was banded. Although I find it easy to feel a sense of disappointment in the fact that I have lost "only" 67 pounds, it's comforting to know that I did not GAIN 10...15...20+ pounds over the course of the year.

I am officially a size 16, again. When I was pushing a size 26, I swore I would be elated to be a size 18 again for the rest of my life. But, alas, it is hard to find happiness when one is looking for happiness in all of the wrong places. My goal for this next year is to concentrate solely on eating well and working on fitness. I am hoping that I can let go of scale numbers and pant sizes long enough to concentrate on what really matters.

Over this past year, a few things have changed. Here is a list of some things that have impacted my life for the better, in no particular order:
  • I no longer worry about being able to keep up with my children.
  • I sleep better.
  • I can run 2-3 miles instead of just 2-3 sidewalk squares.
  • Physical activities don't scare me any longer.
  • I don't exhaust myself in the morning just getting dressed.
  • I don't think people are staring at me anymore.
  • People look me in the eyes rather than staring at me.
  • I no longer think about driving through drive-thrus all day long.
  • When I do go through a drive-thru, I can only eat a VERY small portion of what I used to.
  • My intimate life has gotten better (my husband agrees).
  • I no longer worry about what I am going to wear (okay, that's a lie- but I worry a whole heck less than I used to!).
  • My small shower has gotten larger!
  • I can cross my legs comfortably.
  • I can try on clothes now and actually feel happy about what fits.
  • Along with better self-esteem I have gained a TON of self assertiveness. So don't mess with me! ;)
  • I don't worry about fitting into a chair- or breaking it!
  • Men flirt with me again. This has been hard to get used to. I often think some of my weight gain was to act as a shield from male attention.
  • My whole family eats better and exercises more now.
This list could go on and on, but I am heading back to bed before my head starts to throb again! I am sure I will continue to add to this list during the next few days. I am not really able to think straight right now.

Here's to another successful year in Bandland! Cheers!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Green Olives and Prunes

Green olives and prunes.

DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT eat these two together for breakfast.

Just don't do it.

That's all.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Food Addiction 101


Food addiction is characterized by compulsive eating and an obsession with weight and body image. Persons with a food addiction display an obsession with, and craving for, food and eating, a preoccupation with finding sources of food associated with pleasure and comfort, a compulsive cycle of eating, and the lack of an ability to stop abusing food.

I seem to be back to all of my old tricks. I lay in bed at night and think about my plans for the following day. There seems to be a trend.... get boys ready for the day, go to the mall, EAT OUT YAY!, come home for naps, EAT OUT YAY!, put kids to bed.

My excitement as a stay-at-home Mom centers around going out to eat. That is the highlight of my life right now, and it frustrates the HELL out of me! It has been almost a year since my banding, and it will be a cold day in HADES before I would opt to have my band removed one day. I am still a very SICK food addict. Now, granted I can't eat much at these outings, but the point is, that I LIVE for them. As soon as my kiddos go down for their naps, I look forward to going downstairs, sitting in front of the TV and eating a snack- usually a not so healthy one. I crave just "zoning out". Things are so stressful in my life right now that I am constantly escaping.

Have any of you kicked the food addiction behavior?